Water Safety and Autism: What Every Parent Needs to Know
Let me start by saying something I mean with my whole heart:
You are an incredible parent. You are doing so much for your child. And I realize how overwhelming caring for a child with autism can feel. Between therapy appointments, offering support at home, and advocating in every room and every conversation, you have a lot on your mind.
Water safety should not be one more thing you have to fight for on your own.
But here is the truth. And I am going to say it plainly, because that is the only way I know how to say it.
Children with autism are 160 times more likely to drown than their neurotypical peers. Drowning is the number one cause of death for children under 5. And nearly 70% of childhood drownings happen during non-swim times, when no one was expecting danger.
These are not just statistics. These are children. These are families. And these numbers tell me that we cannot afford to treat water safety as an afterthought.
So this is me, coming to you not with scary statistics and hollow advice, but with a real plan. Because that is what you deserve.
Why Children with Autism Are at Higher Risk Around Water
Before we talk about what to DO, let me explain why this matters so specifically for your family.
Neurodivergent children are often powerfully drawn to water. It shimmers. It reflects. It makes soothing, rhythmic sounds. For a child with sensory-seeking tendencies, water is incredibly compelling. That attraction is not a behavior problem. It is not defiance. It is not something to be frustrated by.
But it does mean that water environments require more intentionality from us as parents and caregivers.
Here is what the data tells us:
49% of children with autism are prone to elopement or wandering. Drowning accounts for over 70% of wandering-related deaths. And 88% of drownings happen when an adult is present, which means supervision alone is NOT enough.
Read that again. An adult was PRESENT for nearly 9 out of 10 childhood drownings.
That is not a parent failing. That is a strategy failing. And it is exactly why I have spent most of my career developing something better.
The Difference Between Supervising and WATCHING
I want to talk about a word that I believe has cost children their lives.
That word is "supervise."
For as long as I have been in the aquatics industry, the standard advice to parents has been: "Make sure there is adult supervision near the water." And for decades, I went along with it. Until I couldn't anymore.
Do you know what "supervise" actually means? It means to observe. To be generally present. It is the 10 road workers standing around while 2 others do the actual work. It is glancing up from your phone every few minutes. It is technically being there without being fully engaged.
That is NOT what our children need.
The word we need to use is WATCHING.
"Watching" means to be ALERTLY on the lookout. To be attentive. To be fully engaged. We watch our children in the car with mirrors on car seats. We watch them sleep with monitors. We watch them on the playground and in parking lots.
And yet, around water, we have been told that supervising is enough.
It is not.
When there is water, our children need us to WATCH. Not scroll. Not chat. Not glance up every few minutes. WATCH. And for children with autism, whose attraction to water is often intense and whose ability to self-regulate near it may be limited, this is not optional. It is everything.
The Story of Jackson
I want to tell you about a little boy named Jackson.
In 2019, Jackson was four years old. He had autism, a deep love of water, and a very real tendency to wander toward it without warning. When he enrolled in my swim class, I knew right away that simply telling him to wait was not going to work.
Jackson needed something he could SEE. Something tangible. Something consistent enough that his brain could build a routine around it.
So I put a blue swim kickboard on the side of the pool. His spot. Every single lesson, the same kickboard, the same place. His waiting area.
Over time, something remarkable happened. Jackson started to understand. He started to WAIT.
That one blue kickboard changed everything. It is what eventually grew into the Waiting Whales Water Safety Kit and the "Where there is water, I will WAIT" strategy that I now teach to families across the country.
Children with autism are not less capable of learning water safety. They just need a different approach. Clear words. Simple routines. Visual tools. Consistent, repeated practice. And a parent who knows what to look for.
That is what we do here.
The WATCHING Initiative: A Framework Built for Your Family
I spent decades teaching swimming lessons and growing increasingly frustrated with what I was seeing. More drownings each year. The same hollow advice repeated. A complete absence of water safety information in preschools and daycares across the country.
In October 2023, I drove nearly 4,000 miles visiting close to 500 preschools and daycares from Virginia to New Mexico and back. I wanted to find out what water safety information was reaching families.
What I found was devastating.
Not one single school had any information about swimming lessons, swim preparedness, water safety, or drowning prevention. Not one.
That trip became the foundation of The WATCHING Initiative, a set of 8 strategies I created to give parents a real framework for keeping their children safe in and around every water environment, from bathtubs to backyard pools to lakes and oceans.
Here is how the W.A.T.C.H.I.N.G. framework applies specifically to families with children who have autism.
W: WHO IS CPR CERTIFIED? CPR is not optional. Our number one goal is to prevent a drowning before it begins, but CPR is a crucial skill in case of emergency. Get certified and recertify every one to two years. Many parents hesitate because they feel unprepared. That hesitation could cost precious minutes. Be ready.
A: ASSIGN A WAITING AREA This is the single most powerful strategy I have ever developed. Children with autism thrive with clear boundaries, consistent routines, and visual cues. A designated waiting area, whether it is a mat, a spot marked on the ground, or a Waiting Whale Kit, gives your child something concrete to anchor to. It turns "do not go near the water" into "this is your spot." That is a language your child can learn.
T: TOUCH WATCHING AND ACTIVE WATCHING There is a difference between watching your child and being ACTIVELY watching your child. Touch Watching means being within arm's reach, with your eyes on your child at all times. No phone. No conversation that pulls your gaze away. No exceptions. For children with autism who may move toward water quickly and without warning, Touch Watching is not overcautious. It is necessary.
C: CELL PHONES DOWN I will say it plainly. Cell phones down so children do not drown. Find time for scrolling when water is not part of the equation. Even a few seconds is too long when water is near. This is especially true for our neurodivergent kids, who may move toward water faster than we expect.
H: HAVE APPROPRIATE FLOTATION DEVICES There is a lot of confusion about flotation devices, and I want to clear it up. Life jackets are a non-negotiable in and around uncontrolled water: oceans, lakes, and rivers. In a pool setting, the decision is more nuanced. What I can tell you is that flotation devices are a layer of protection, not a replacement for WATCHING. A child wearing a floatie is not a child who is safe to be unattended.
I: INSTALL ALL BARRICADES Nearly 70% of drownings of children under 5 happen during non-swim times. That means a child accessed water when no one was prepared for it. Proper fencing, self-latching gates, door alarms, and locks are your physical barriers against elopement and wandering near water. For families navigating autism, this layer is especially critical.
N: NEVER LEAVE WITHOUT CHECKING ENTRY POINTS The allure of water can be irresistible for children with autism. Before leaving any water environment, including the bathroom, the backyard, or a neighbor's house, check and secure every access point. Make this a non-negotiable part of your routine.
G: GET ENROLLED IN LESSONS Swim lessons are essential. But I want to be clear about something: the goal is not to hand your child off and hope for the best. YOUR role in this process is irreplaceable. Find an instructor who has experience with neurodivergent children. When possible, look for instructors who are certified through AutismSwim. Ask questions. Be involved. A good instructor will welcome you into the process.
What to Look for in a Swim Instructor for Your Child with Autism
Not all swim instruction is created equal. For children with autism, the approach matters enormously.
Here is what I want you to look for:
A good instructor will meet your child where they are, not where the curriculum says they should be. They will use visual cues, consistent language, and repetition. They will not rush your child. They will understand that learning to wait is as important as learning to kick. They will communicate with you, not just teach at your child.
You have every right to ask an instructor about their experience with neurodivergent children before you enroll. You have every right to observe lessons. You have every right to be part of this process.
Ten questions to ask before enrolling your child in swim lessons are available as a free download on my website. Please use them.
The Rules We Set Everywhere Else
I want to ask you something.
Would you put a Halloween costume on your two-year-old and let her walk up to a stranger's door by herself? Of course not. You would hold her hand. You would stay close. You would keep your eyes on her the entire time.
Would you take your child to the grocery store, put them in the cart, and then turn your back to scroll through your phone? Not a chance.
We have all kinds of rules about parking lots, playgrounds, and crossing the street. We put covers on outlets and locks on cabinets. We research car seats for hours. We make our homes accident-free.
And yet drowning is the number one cause of accidental death in children under 5. Not Halloween. Not parking lots. DROWNING.
I do not say this to shame anyone. I say it because I desperately want the mindset to change. I want parents to apply the same rules, the same presence, and the same protective instincts at the pool that they apply everywhere else. Your child deserves those rules around water too.
Building Your Water Safety Emergency Plan
For families navigating autism and elopement, I created the Water Safety Emergency Plan specifically for you.
This is a simple, neighbor-ready plan that helps you build a communication network with the people around you so you are not navigating a water emergency alone. It gives you an organized way to share important information about your child, map nearby water risks, and make sure trusted neighbors know exactly what to do if they ever see your child near water or wandering without you.
It is proactive. It is practical. And it is free.
You can make your Water Safety Emergency Plan today at watersafetywithmissdayna.com/autism.
"Where There Is Water, I Will WAIT"
This is the phrase I teach every child in my program. It is the phrase on the Waiting Whales Water Safety Kit. It is the foundation of everything.
Where there is water, I will WAIT.
Not because water is scary. Not because fun is not allowed. But because the safest child is the one who has been taught exactly what to do before they are ever in a situation where it matters.
For children with autism, this phrase is even more powerful when it is paired with a physical waiting spot, a consistent routine, and a caregiver who reinforces it every single time. Repetition is not boring. Repetition is safety.
You Are Not Alone In This
I am certified through AutismSwim, have visited dozens of education centers for children with autism, and have collaborated with the Autism Society because I believe that the autism community deserves more than generic water safety advice. You deserve strategies that were built with your child in mind.
If your child loves water, that is not a problem to be solved. That is a gift to be channeled into skills, routines, and safety practices that can last a lifetime.
If you are overwhelmed by the statistics, I understand. I am asking you to turn that overwhelm into action. Not all at once. One strategy at a time.
Get your CPR certification.
Find an instructor who understands your child.
And know that there is a whole community here ready to support you!
Additional Resources for Autism and Water Safety
Make Your Free Water Safety Emergency Plan
The Waiting Whales Water Safety Kit
The WATCHING Initiative (Full Framework)
10 Questions to Ask Before Enrolling Your Child in Swim Lessons
Miss Dayna's Featured Resources for the Autism Community
Autism Voyage | Autism Parenting Magazine | David Kaufer Podcast | Autism Parenting Secrets Podcast | Talk Like A Mother Podcast
Dayna Harvey is a water safety expert and swimming instructor who has been certified since 1988. She is certified through AutismSwim and has partnered with the Autism Society to bring water safety education to neurodivergent families across the country. She is the founder of The WATCHING Initiative and creator of the Waiting Whales Water Safety Kit. Learn more at watersafetywithmissdayna.com.